One more intention set
The other day, when I woke up, I promised myself 4 things
- No matter what happens, I will keep myself happy today.
- I won’t indulge in an argument with anyone.
- I won’t try to change anyone’s behavior.
- I won’t throw my opinions on others
The goal for the day was to be happy in any situation. I was all set with my intentions for the day.
One more fight
After few hours, I had to go shopping with my wife. As soon as I entered the car and suddenly a behavior of my wife disturbed me. I forgot each and every promise I did few minutes before and got upset with whatever happened.
As soon as I realized that I am going to get crazy, I started applying every damn thing I knew to divert my mind and be happy again. Even I have written a beautiful article 10 Ways To Be Happy In Next 10 Minutes.
None of the tricks were working on me. The harder I tried, the more upset I became. All I had was a mind with full of questions waiting for an explanation of what just happened.
How can she do it again to me? Should she have thought at least once before all this shit?
I even went to the extreme thinking of what the sense of having such relationship?. All these negative thoughts started coming in my mind. I didn’t have any idea how a small issue can lead to such extreme thoughts.
In those few seconds, I forgot every god damn thing done by my wife. My ego was just waiting for a satisfactory explanation from the other end.
I couldn’t resist myself and in a matter of a couple of seconds, we both got indulged in a petty verbal fight. Both of us started blaming each other for all the past mistakes. All the drama went for at least 2 hours. Then there was a complete silence for next few hours.
The complete relationship got messed up in a matter of few seconds.
One more realization
When I tried to reflect my thoughts after few hours of silence, the only thing I observed was a mind full of regrets. I am sure that the same regret was being observed by my wife as well.
We could have resisted ourselves. All these could have been ignored. Few words could have been left unsaid. But the damage was already done.
One more lesson learned
But I learned a very important lesson that day. Believe me, the next line is going to make your entire life easy.
Whenever there is a moment of heat, Just shut up your mouth and let the time talking.
Time is the best healer in such situations. Give some time to time.
One observation is that whenever I used my tongue more than it was supposed to be; the only thing I got in return was regret. I always regret every damn word I use in an argument at some point later in time.
I have taken the lesson very seriously. Whenever I find myself indulging in any unnecessary debate, I try to keep my wisdom with me and just try to get out of the situation anyhow. The goal is always to resist any temptation of showing any superiority over the other and keep my mouth shut.
This comes with practice. You will definitely get failed the first time. Just try it once more and then one more time until you get it right.
No one gets anything from anger or showing unhappiness because of someone’s unexpected behavior. It’s always a lose-lose situation.
Everyone thinks himself always correct and our mind always finds reasons to justify the fault of the other one. If someone knows that whatever he is doing is not correct, he wouldn’t have done the same in the first place. This is the way our illusioned mind works.
In such situations, unlearn everything you learned to get happiness. Just sit quietly with yourself and let the time show its magic. Sometimes, it’s okay not to be okay.
You must have seen that with time people even come out from the worst situation of losing their closed ones. They lose a person they think they can’t live without and in a matter of few months/years the life again comes on track. They again start laughing the same way as nothing happened.
Time is a miracle. Just have some trust in it. Ups and downs are a part of life and sometimes we have no control over the situation.The only thing which is in our control the way we react to it.
So, today do one promise to yourself. If you come across any such situations in life, the moment you realize it, stop reacting to the situation.
Source: google images
If you have any such Mantras to resolve daily life issues then please do share it in the comment box. A trick seems simple to you might be a boon for one’s life.
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